August 2011
270 posts
July 2011
136 posts
To-Do List
- Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say, “Help! I’ve been turned into a parrot.”
- Have a conversation on Facebook with a friend. Delete all my comments. Make friend look insane.
- Divide by zero. Escape math class through the wormhole it creates.
- Boycott shampoo. Demand real poo.
- Wear shirt that says “Life.” Hand out lemons.
- Make vanilla pudding. Put in a jar of mayo. Eat in public.
- Spray a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Laugh because he will never have any friends.
- Live forever. It is a success, so far.
- Find a burger that looks like the one in a commercial.
- Make Where’s Waldo book. Exclude Waldo.
- Hide money in pocket of winter coat. Forget money is there. Get excited when I find the money there come winter time.
Dear Future Girlfriend,
Please be patient with me. Please.
I will push you away. I will get panic attacks and run away. I don’t know why I am doing this. I really don’t know. All I know is that I really like you, but when I feel that someone actually likes me back, I just freak out.
I’m so sorry. I’m going to fuck it all up.
Love,
Me.
sigh.
Play
Play
“Anyone who has ever struggled with poverty knows how extremely expensive it is to be poor.”
—James Baldwin (via socialismartnature)